Currently Listening Non - Toxic - Philippine Music CD see related

Reliving the Past.

Just decided to write an entry although I know no one's gonna read this. Haha! So.. yeah.. Hi. =p

I missed this blog really. Xaga was the secondblog provider I had, the first was tabulas. So this is kind of special to me. I remembered my first xanga was all about me and my boyfriend bakc then (which is now my 'ex'-boyfriend)

I have a blogspot right now, and I'm trying to get nominated for blog of the week. I know I can't win but it's worth a try, right? The people who got nominated are genuses, I don't know if I'm gonna win this. My life isn't that interesting to read.

Anyways, It's 1:40am and it's my younger brother's field trip today.  I dunno if he'll enjoy. He'll probably need a lot of money to do so.

Hm..so I just dropped by. Hope to get this blog working again! 'Bye!

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CLOSED ;;

I'M MOVING.. I'M NOT GONNA POST HERE ANYMORE.. PLEASE GO TO MY OTHER BLOGS..

CLICK HERE FOR MY BLOGSPOT ACCOUNT,,

(    OR COPY AND PASTE THIS TO YOUR BROWSER..

HTTP://LIFEANDSUICIDE.BLOGSPOT.COM   ) 

AND HERE FOR MY LIVEJOURNAL ACCOUNT..

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I ALSO HAVE A MULTIPLY..

CLICK HERE TO REDIRECT YOUR BROWSER..

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THANKS A LOT AND IT'S BEEN FUN BLOGGING WITH YOU.

ü

who knows, maybe i'll post here again in the future..

Currently Listening You Can't See Me By John Cena & tha Trademarc see related

I'm 15. Gah.

Growing older is not all that. I mean, whenever my birthday comes, it's not that birthday-y type of birthday. We eat something we don't usually eat at dinner, I get a lot of greetings from people and classmates. I don't get a lot of gifts but greetings from my classmates is enough to make me smile. I love it when people who aren't close to me greets me a happy birthday. It's kinda flattering since you don't know that person that much but then they give you a chance to hear their happy birthdays. I wasn't that happy though. I mean, I do not ask for a grand birthday, but then something seems missing. Michael came. He ate. He greeted me. It was nice, but then something was kind of missing. I'm not saying that he's the problem. I also not saying I'm not contented with his presence. I am. He can arrive at my house without a gift and that's okay. In fact, it's more that okay. I just need his presence and everything's okay. He gave me a cute top as a gift from one of my favorite designers. Artwork. Actually he gave me that as a Monthsary gift, but then I consider it a birthday gift since I can't ask for anything anymore. All are there. It's enough. But I can also say that it's too much. Hee. I went a little embarrassed because when I took the tag (because I collect tags from different designers), I saw that the top was a little pricey. I wanted to give him something else in return of the cute top, but I don't have money to buy him something. I'm a little displeased with myself. I know he doesn't expect me to return the gift, but the price was too much. So I'll give you, whoever you are, this little advise.. Never leave the price tag on something you gave out as a gift. My conscience is killing me. I really want to give him something in exchange!T_T

Anyway, I'm in the middle of something right now. I want to go out with my friends, and do stuff to forget it. But the more I try to, the more I remember. I hate it when I get this feeling. I think of myself as someone who is so mean. I don't want to read this post and say to myself that I'm so bad to have said these all. I don't want to think about trust again. It hurts for me to think of something bad. I hate myself for doing this paragraph. I can't stop. I want to type it down but I shouldn't. Someone might read this post who knows me personally.

Anyways, since I want to stop, I have to go. =)

Not Again.

Today isn't one of the best days of my life. Now I'm gonna fall asleep crying again. He went home unhappy. I watched him walk away distrought. It was because of this new band I kind of loved. I made a joke about them. I think he kinda started it all since he was the first to joke. He told me he had to go home since he has to go to his 'second' one. I rode along but told him 'ok stay with her! I'll be with 'tatsi'![Tatsi is one of the members of the band.] He took it seriously and went out. He didn't come in for minutes though it was raining outside. When I came out all he could say was that he has to go home. I don't really know who was the one to say sorry. I invited him in to talk him down but he said no. I was a little irritated because I was trying to fix this little misunderstanding but then he wasn't cooperating. I went inside and cried. He came in and again, all he could say was he had to go home. I cried. I didn't show my face to him but he insisted so he grabbed my hand and took it off my face. I said sorry to him and all he could do was nod and nod. I wasn't sure he was okay with everything since he only nodded. I continued to say sorry and that I wasn't mad. I asked him if he was, he said no. I wasn't trusting his answer. Surely he's a little mad because of it all. When he finally left, I can't help but cry. Not again. We're in this misunderstanding pace again. Grr.

Every good thing has something bad following it. The day before yesterday was nice. He told me 12 reasons why he loves me, and he forced me to do the same. It felt good in a way that he had a lot more reasons than those.

How I wish we get through this. Without a single one of us thinking of a break up. I love him so much.

So sick.

I've been sick for three days. Grr. Today's the third and my throat is sore. I also have this stubborn cough. I've taken medicine but somehow it won't stop. Obviously I'm absent from class. They checked exam papers taday because last thursday and friday was our monthly examinations. I didn't have high grades though. Gah! As I predicted, I got a low grade at Physics and Math. I had 12 errors in English because My mind was thinking about what to answer in Physics.

Okay enough of that. Yesterday was one of my happiest days although I had a fever. Michael came and gave me an advance monthsary gift. He gave me a tshirt and it was one of my favorite brands. It had a 02 on it that made it extra special. Hee.

Now I have one problem. I'[m trying to think what I'm gonna give him on wednesday.

Bye.